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Jingdong book

流放的老国王

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流放的老国王

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爱的见证,对患病父亲的一份详细报告。
因为父亲再也无法从桥那头走到我的世界来,因此我必须走到他那里去
这段不平常的日子,我们一直在一起
爱父亲,为他朗读这本书(作品有声书,同步上线)


相关推荐:

《聆听父亲》

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Content Description

《流放的老国王》是一本十分感人的关于父亲的书。
家里有患上老年痴呆症的老人,那家庭会变成什么样?
书中的这位父亲患上了老年痴呆症,但依然充满活力,拥有不失幽默的智慧。只是疾病让他慢慢丧失了记忆和理智,他逐渐失去了他的生活。
他就在家里,可“要回家”的渴望无时不在。他的话语,表面上看毫无意义,但听上去却常常如诗般美妙。这些简短的句子中,魅力、幽默、自信和尊严,让我们相信这一切在人年老时仍然存在。家庭并没有因此瓦解,家人更紧密地连结起来。
这场疾病,也让他们重新认识了彼此。

Author Description

阿尔诺·盖格尔(Arno Geiger),1968年出生于奥地利布雷根茨,成长于福拉尔贝格州的沃尔福特。曾在维也纳及因斯布鲁就读德语文学、古代史和比较文学专业。1993年成为自由作家。他获得过一系列文学奖项,也得到许多读者的喜爱。目前他生活在沃尔福特和维也纳。

Comments

这是爱的见证,是对患病父亲的一份详细报告,描写了父亲与孩子们的关系,同时也讲述了对自我的追寻。时而令人感伤,时而让人抿嘴微微一笑。这是本美妙的书。
——《世界报》

盖格尔讲述的不是疾病,而是世界。他用风趣的笔触介绍了这样一个世界,在这个世界中,理智和痴呆之间的距离一点都不像人们想象的那么遥远。在书中,没有任何东西被美化,只是,有些东西变得更明晰了。
——德国ARD电台

美妙而又感人……是一部令人陶醉的作品。它源自生活,却又以一种自然的方式给人带来艺术之美。
——《每日镜报》

Book Abstract

我六岁时,祖父不认识我了。祖父的房子坐落在我们家房子下方,我上学时为了抄近路常经过他的果园,有时候他会扔过一把木柴驱赶我,还说,我又没有在他的果园里丢失什么东西,干吗跑到他这儿来。不过有时候他也乐于见到我,会走过来叫我,把我叫成赫尔穆特。对于这些现象,当时的我并不在意,没注意到有什么不正常,后来也忘了,直到这病开始袭击父亲。
俄罗斯有句俗语说,生命中除了我们犯的错误,没有任何其他的事情会重现。而错误在老年时加重了。父亲为人一向孤僻,他退休后不久老是一人出神发呆,我们认为他对外界一丁点兴趣也没有了,觉得这还真是他典型的生活态度。好几年里,我们一直劝说他,应该努力让自己走出去,搞得他非常苦恼。
如今那些浪费了的精力让我感受到一种无声的愤怒,我们当初责备的是人,而针对的却是疾病。我们成百次地对他说“不要再这样任性散漫了!”,父亲遵循“忍一时风平浪静,退一步海阔天空”的原则,耐心地听着我们唠叨。他不抵挡遗忘,也从不寻求能够帮助记忆的法子,所以也不至于因为家人为了提醒他在他手帕上打结而埋怨。对自己脑力的衰退,他并不顽强抵抗以保卫阵地,甚至对此提也没有提起过一次。如今看来,最晚在90年代中他已经意识到事情的严重性了。如果他当初曾对儿女们说,抱歉,我脑子不行了,大家可能就比较容易应付那种状态。然而,那些年里我们大家都在玩着猫捉老鼠的游戏,父亲是老鼠,我们是一群老鼠,而疾病是猫。
最初极度紧张不安的时期现在已经过去了,虽然我不愿意回想它,不过现在我明白了,由于不愿意继续下去而放弃和知道被击败了而放弃,二者之间是有区别的。父亲知道自己被击败了,到了生命中精力衰退的时段,父亲转而寄希望于内在的沉着镇定,在药物效用低微的情况下,这样做让父亲和我们这些家属都获得了一种有效的应付困境的可能性。
米兰·昆德拉写过:我们称之为生命的那无可回避的溃败,在它面前,我们唯一能够做的就是理解它。
目前父亲处于老年痴呆症的中期,在我想象中,中期的情况大概是这样:人好像刚从睡梦中惊醒过来,不知身处何方,各式各样的事物,比如地点、时间、人物,围绕着自己转,人找不到方向。种种事物缠绕着你,死去的人、活着的人、记忆、带着创伤的幻觉、意思不明的零碎句子,等等。而这样的状态在以后的日子里不可能有所改善。
因为我们家人口比较多,照顾父亲的工作大家可以分担,所以我不必经常回老家去。每当我在那儿时,早上大约九点我会叫醒父亲,这时他茫然不知所措地躺在被窝里,不过他已经习惯于对他而言是陌生的人进入他的房间了,所以也并没有产生什么怀疑和不快。
“你要不要起床啊?”我很友善地问,为了制造一点轻松的氛围,我还会说,“我们的生活多好啊!”
父亲满脸疑虑地挣扎着起来。“对你来说或许是这样。”他说。
我把袜子递给他,他仔细看着袜子,过了一下说:“第三只在哪儿?”
为了不浪费时间,我帮他穿衣,他听凭我帮忙,并不表示反对。接着我半推着带他去厨房吃早餐,吃过早餐,我要他去刮胡子,他眨眨眼说:“我还是在自己家比较好,我不会很快再来看你了。”
我指着通向盥洗室的过道。为了拖时间,他说:“哎呀—哎呀—哎呀—哎呀……”
“你只不过就是去刮刮胡子,刮了胡子,人看起来精神些。”
他迟疑地跟着我。“如果你指望点什么……”他嘟嘟囔囔地说,看着镜子,两只手用力地搓着翘起来的头发,而头发也就真的服帖了。他再照照镜子,说“差不多跟新理了发似的”,微笑着,衷心向我道谢。
那一阵子他经常对人表示谢意。几天前,他说:“我要预先衷心感谢你。”我却找不到一丁点可以联系起感谢的事情。
对于类似的开场白我慢慢地知道迎合他的意思了。我会说:“很高兴为你做这事。”或“不用谢。”或“这是我乐意做的。”根据经验,我们回答父亲的话如果是认可性的,父亲就安心,觉得一切正常,比起以前我们老是追根究底想弄明白父亲的意图好多了。追根究底地问,只会让父亲觉得羞愧和不安。即使他明白了我们的意思而回答了,答案也只会让他难堪。
最初,这种适应父亲的措施使我觉得痛心,也很耗费精力。因为作为儿女的人,会认为父母是强有力的人物,以为他们能够顽强对待生命中出现的难题,看着他们日益明显地衰老下去会比看着别人衰老更加难堪。不过这期间我已经习惯了进入新角色,而且也逐渐学习到一种道理,我们需要另外一套标准来应对老年痴呆症患者的生活。
如果父亲想对人表示谢意,那就让他谢,即使我们看不出任何感谢的理由;如果他要埋怨全部人都丢弃他不管了,那就随他埋怨,不要去管他的说法在事实面前能不能站得住脚。对他而言,除了老年痴呆症患者的世界,没有其他世界。因此,作为家人,我只能通过承认病人那陷于混乱的现实,努力试着减轻一些整个事态的悲哀和痛苦。
因为父亲已经无法通过到达我这里的桥梁,那么我就必须到他那儿去。在那边,在他精神状态的限度之内,在我们讲求事实和目的性的社会之外,父亲还一直是个相当了不起的人物。即使按照一般的标准他不总是有理智,然而,从某种角度看,他仍然相当出色。
……

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