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如何问,别人才肯说

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●日本沟通大师内藤谊人超级问话术!
●8大诀窍、10大原则、10种方法、21种技巧,教你在9大情境中用问话说服所有人!
任何时间、任何地点、面对任何人,获得你想要的任何信息。
只要你可以跟对方搭上话,他的一切信息,在不知不觉间都会被你掌握!
▲8大诀窍——操纵你的谈话对象,让对方按照你的意旨去行动,进而达到你的目的。
▲10大原则——谈话对象特点组织你的语言,摸透你的谈话对象。
▲10种方法——避免谈话中可能出现的各种意外,击破对方心理防线。
▲21种技巧——在交流中正确提问,不需多费唇舌,快速提升你的沟通力。
8大诀窍、10大原则、10种方法和21种技巧,教你在9大情境中用问话说服所有人!

海报:

Content Description

▲如果邀请暗恋的对象一起共进晚餐,如何问才能圆满地达到目的?
▲如果向上司提交一份方案,一直没有回应,怎么问才能不让领导直接拒绝?
▲如果员工在工作中推卸责任,模糊概念,怎样才能问出真实的信息?
▲如果在高端谈判中对手闪烁其词,怎么问才能知道对方的底线?
所有的这些问题的背后,有一套语言的规则吗?面对拒绝,我们该怎样实现非暴力的有效沟通呢?
在这个信息碎片化的大时代,我们每时每刻都会遇到一些自己想知道的问题。有些事情你觉得不对,却一时不知如何应变,你是沉默接受,还是提出关键问题,悄无声息地突破对方的心理防线?面对质疑,你有能力组织自己的观点,问出你想问的吗?面对僵局,你该如何不露痕迹地把控谈话方向,将所有难题一一化解?
针对上述问题,日本公关大师内藤谊人详尽剖析了人们在沟通中的盲点,认为问对一个好的问题,能达到事半功倍的效果。在书中,内藤谊人总结出了有效沟通的21个技巧、8个诀窍、10项原则,提出了许多立竿见影的谈话、倾听、行动技巧。通过这些,你能说出自己想说的,问出你想要的答案。而一个人如果忽略了问话的学问,那么就他就有可能像现代管理之父德鲁克说的那样:
“如果你不改变问问题的方式,你永远都不会成功。”
Author Description

内藤谊人,日本著名的心理学家、日本庆应义塾大学社会学研究科博士、安捷鲁有限公司董事长。他在以说服交流为主的社会心理学和以精神分析为主的临床心理学方面成就显著,被称为“日本狡猾的心理学家”。著有《“蒙混”心理术》《百分百说服力》《攻心说话术》《攻心说服力》等畅销书,在日本反响极大。

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★《如何问,别人才肯说》是值得现在的每一个追求结果的人好好阅读的一本书。从如何分析谈话对象到如何击破对方心理,得出你想要的结果。内藤谊人的敏锐洞察力和战略战术无疑将大大提升你的沟通力。
——《日本经济新闻》

★这本书引入了新的思考方式和沟通技巧。它会让你成为一个好丈夫、好父亲、好兄弟和好经理,给你的人生带来不小的改变,真诚地希望每个人都能从中得益。
——《纽约时报》
Catalogue

前言:你想要的"答案",要藏在"问题"里
第一章:把"答案"藏在问题里
询问"容易回答的问题"
提问时,记得要装傻!
用问题当诱饵,影响他
把"答案"藏在"问题"里
摸清对方的"心理透视法"
可怕的"问题砍刀"
改变答案,关键在"怎么问"
理智思考和感情用事
淘金式思维:你微笑了吗
像分析师一样去询问
【专栏1】讲话"有条理"不如学会提问,说服各种人
第二章:不要说你想说的,说对方想听的
绘制你的"信息地图"
你真的把话说清楚了吗
如何争取对话的主导权
如何获得更多人的支持
如何应对会议终结者
如何应对故意刁难者
让对方进入你想要的状态
抓住信号性字眼
【专栏2】小问题,大创意
第三章:不讨人厌的"神奇问话术"
提问时,把对方名字讲出来
二分式思维:你想知道满意的结果吗
海绵式思维:可以帮我的忙吗
"价值增大效应"
"是什么"和"应不应该"问题
将干扰"体面化"
这样说,就不尴尬了
称赞"你看得到的部分"
"不提问"和"让他说"
90%的说服不是用嘴来完成的
【专栏3】没交情前,别问太深入的问题
第四章:这样问,对方才会"招供"
空白邮件:提高你的回复率
投影法:谈论别人时顺势说出想法
低姿态探寻,透露更重要信息
二段式提问,引诱他的"真正想法"
预想"最坏的打算"
讽刺效应:你不告诉我也没有关系
如何听,对方才会说
不问,就不会知道的事
别想太多,越在意越要"问"
大胆提问,总比不说话好
【专栏4】想听到"反对意见",提问后先等十秒钟
第五章:一切从"好问题"开始
满足他的情感需求
预告法:你能接受的最坏的情况
"反问"的力量
"有限选择"询问法
如何应对不怀好意的问题
如何应对不懂的问题
暗示性"投降"
搭桥工具箱:请别人来帮忙
互惠原则:在我需要帮忙时,麻烦你了
欠的人情,可以还我吗?
让对方快乐,而不是花钱
【专栏5】不知如何开口问时,自言自语都比沉默好
第六章:"好问题"比命令更有效
截止效应:注意"结束的时间"
"寻找犯人"的游戏
科学的包装:让他乖乖听话的理由
如何让孩子更听话
如何说让会议更顺利
如何从马拉松式的会议中脱身
如何拜托别人帮忙
如何让"拖延症患者"快速回复
"用问题"让他快速做决定
【专栏6】不懂就问,只要"发言",就会产生自信心
后记:这样说,对方才会听
附录:
如何问,对方才愿意回答
8个问题,控制一场谈判
6大谈判技巧,问出对方心里话
35种方法,让你沟通更有效
Book Abstract

把“答案”藏在“问题”里
大部分的人都没有自己的看法,无论是关于政治、经济、教育或文学,绝大多数的人都没有意见、感想。因此,当被问到“关于××,你觉得怎么样?”之类的问题时,其实会感到非常困扰。因为自己原本就没有坚定的看法。
“你觉得严格管教小孩比较好吗?还是宠爱比较好?”
就算被这样问到,大多数人也只能回答:“这个嘛……怎么说呢?”被问到:“日圆升值比较好?还是贬值比较好?”“这个嘛……没办法肯定地说耶……”,大致上的意见都是如此。
无关聪明或愚昧,人类对事物就是没有“明确的看法”,就连这么说的我,看法也并不坚定。基本上,本来就不该问别人对事情的看法。一开始就没有的东西,就算你试图将它引出来也是不可能的,这就叫作“无中生有”。
英国肯特州立大学的马利亚?扎拉贡扎博士曾让98名大学生观看8分钟的迪斯尼电影,然后问大家:“迪雷尼摔倒时,膝盖流血了,对吧?”结果,大部分的人都会回答:“没错,是膝盖。”实际上,迪雷尼根本没有流血,即使遭人刻意“植入”,我们也不自觉地就接受了。
另外,美国田纳西州克里斯蒂恩兄弟大学的布莱恩?巴侬博士让30名大学生观看5分钟的日常情景影片,事后并提问:“华勒斯在葛洛米特要出门时,对他说了什么话?”事实上,葛洛米特出门时,华勒斯一句话也没说。
这样的提问方式,宛如对学生植入“华勒斯有对葛洛米特说话”的内容。结果,竟然有77%的人都自行帮他杜撰“等我一下”、“别走”之类的台词。
看法要用“植入”的,若希望对方照自己的想法回答,在提问时就需偷偷植入希望从对方口中引出的答案。我们的大脑极不精确,只要被技巧性地植入特定内容后,便会开始偏向与其一致的方向。只要能了解这个道理,就能轻易地误导对方的思想。
“我觉得星巴克的焦糖玛奇朵很好喝,你觉得呢?”这问题中植入了“好喝”这样的字眼,因此,大多数人都会受到影响,只会说出被暗示的答案。
理智思考和感情用事
之前曾有一个育有两名幼儿的母亲投书到报纸,表示“在英国,就算只是萍水相逢,人们都会帮忙不认识的人搬运婴儿车上下阶梯,但在日本却不会,真令人难过。”这篇文章散发着浓浓的指责味道,感觉就像在说“英国不愧是绅士之国,日本男人在这方面的表现一点儿都不好”。
不过,我倒想问这位母亲,为什么不向附近的男性问一声:“可以帮我搬婴儿车吗?”受到怀抱着两名幼儿的女性请求,大部分的男性应该都会愿意帮忙吧。自己不主动求助却生气,一点道理都没有,不是吗?
“这种小事还要人家说!”这样的心情我能体会,可是我们并没有能洞悉他人内心的超能力。何况,只要客客气气地求助,相信满怀善意的日本男性也大都是乐意相助的。重点在于,要主动提出“希望别人采取行动”的要求,绝不能自己不出声求助却动不动就发脾气。
“真是的,我手下那帮人,没交代的事就不做。”也有上司会这样咒骂员工,但那是理所当然的事。在上司还没指示前就先做了,反而会被解读为“专断独行”,遭到训斥。“没指示就不做”,原本就被认为理所当然。
希望对方照自己的话去做,首先就要不带情绪地提出你的要求:“可以帮我一个忙吗?”
这样请求别人很困难吗?应该不难吧!擅自认为别人会释出善意,甚至抱怨对方没依自己的期待去做,乱发脾气,才是没道理。
哥伦比亚大学的弗朗西斯?弗莱茵博士建议我们:“如果需要向他人求助,那就要不带情绪地提出请求。”这本来就是正常的态度。
“有人拿走公共档案资料后没有物归原位,真是乱来!”与其这样发怒,倒不如不带情绪地说:“可以将用完的档案资料放回原来的位置吗?”只要提醒两三次,相信对方就会照规矩归还资料了。
根据弗莱茵博士的说法,大部分的人都充满善意,只要不带情绪地提出请求,就能得到令人满意的结果。没有说出请求就怒气冲冲,根本就是搞不清楚状况。美国有一则这样的笑话,最后介绍给大家:
“汤米,你的成绩很差啊,为什么就不能像哥哥一样拿高分呢?”
“可是,妈,你又没有要求我要拿到好成绩,不是吗?”
……
Introduction

你想要的“答案”,要藏在“问题”里
通常,很会说服他人的人,多半也很会提问,擅长用高明的问题,慢慢诱导对方照自己所希望的方向去执行。
比方说,善于提问的男生想约女生出去时,死也不会说:“下次要不要和我一起去吃个饭?”
因为用这种方式问女生,被拒绝的可能性极大。因此,他们会以这类方式提出邀约:
“如果想邀请你吃饭,星期五和星期六,你哪一天比较方便呢?”
此外,擅长提问的业务员,都会用下列的问话方式进行推销:
客户:“像我们这种小公司,几乎没有什么添购设备的预算。”
业务员:“说的也是,不好意思。可是呢,抱歉,好像我在揪你逻辑问题似的,所谓‘几乎没有’的意思是‘有一点儿’?”
客户:“嗯,算是吧,真的就只有一点儿。”
那么,要如何才能成为“提问高手”呢?如果想要知道这个秘密,请务必阅读本书,因为本书介绍了大量有益于成为“提问高手”的知识和技巧。
“居然有这种做法!”
“嗯……原来如此,如果这样说,任何人都会被说服了!”
“哇!真希望早点学会使用这种方法!”
只要阅读本书,就能获得令你茅塞顿开的丰富知识,不论是谁都能轻易成为“提问高手”,连正在写作中的我都不免赞叹:“还有比这本更牛更实用的书吗?”
而且,这些知识好用到,能让你一辈子都受用无穷,只要学会提问的技巧,就能顺着自己的意念操纵任何人,得到想要的答案,度过一帆风顺的精彩人生。
各位读者是不是开始有点心动,想一窥本书的内容呢?是不是也渐渐被引起兴趣了呢?甚至越来越急着想要学会这套神奇问话术呢?
假如有这样的念头,那正是中了我的诱导术(哈哈)。我正故意将文章写得十分诱人,若承蒙阅读本书,相信如同这样的心理诱导伎俩,各位读者也能轻而易举学得会。
内藤谊人

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Seller will ship the orders within 1-2 business days. The logistics time limit is expected to be 7-15 working days. In case of customs clearance, the delivery time will be extended by 3-7 days. The final receipt date is subject to the information of the postal company.

Yami Points information

All items are excluding from any promotion or points events on Yamibuy.com

Return Policy

You may return product within 30 days upon receiving the product. Items returned must be new in it's original packing, including the original invoice for the purchase. Customer return product at their own expense.

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About the brand

Jingdong book

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About the brand

Jingdong book