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Jingdong book

大师谈儿童习惯培养

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大师谈儿童习惯培养

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《大师谈儿童习惯培养》从浩瀚的大师创作中遴选出经典的教育篇章,将大师们的教育思想和智慧系统、集中、分类地呈现给广大读者,为读者亲近大师提供了一条比较便捷的途径。《大师谈儿童习惯培养》所选取的文章是在以人为本的教育前提下,从众多的大师著作中选出的经典教育美文,都有一定的高度,融故事性和哲理性于一体。阅读这《大师谈儿童习惯培养》,读者会沐浴在教育智慧的光芒之中,享受心智的快乐,从而多一份教育的眼光,多一份教育的思维,多一份教育的感悟和启迪。
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第一篇 告诫篇
当儿子有了不良习惯时
习惯的道德意义和教育意义
播种一种习惯,收获一种人生
好习惯在于养成
当习惯成了自然
两种习惯养成不得
儿童要自幼养成战胜困难的习惯
良好习惯早养成
桑树要小弯
习惯的性质

第二篇 学习篇
养成良好的思维习惯
养成良好的读书习惯
培养孩子的想象力
忧虑是一种坏习惯
有效小技巧帮你改习惯
读书的习惯重于方法
养成两种好习惯——《学习国文的新路》序
培养孩子良好的学习习惯
孩子应该有怎样的学习习惯
一分钟记忆力比赛——有你意想不到的成功
培养孩子学习乐趣并不难

第三篇 生活篇
让儿子养成良好的饮食习惯
培养女儿良好的生活习惯
饮食的习惯
充满爱意的习惯
打破储积、保存的习惯
良好的习惯
有规律生活的重要性
养成好习惯
卫生上的习惯
夏天的选择
良好的习惯是孩子成功的基本

第四篇 教育篇
论习惯与教育
使习惯服从你的意愿
道德习惯
不要盲目地相信培养习惯的科目
论习惯的培养
习惯与思想
如何培养孩子终身受益的习惯
论习惯和风气对道德赞许情感的影响
再谈管孩子
培养孩子的好习惯,先从家庭教育入手
鼓励和教育学生养成良好的劳动习惯

第五篇 行为篇
论习惯——一个不易改变的成规
打磨孩子成为“钻石”
把习惯运用于身体训练之中
养成谈吐优雅和举止文雅的习惯
练习和习惯
不会坐的孩子
重视良好行为习惯的养成教育
行为塑造须从细微之处入手
第六篇 能力篇
劳动习惯
好习惯是孩子一生的财富
通过练习培养习惯
帮孩子养成自助能力和习惯
文明卫生习惯
“习惯成自然”
小步子,大目标——连锁塑造
别为孩子“擦屁股”
Book Abstract

第一篇告诫篇
当儿子有了不良习惯时[德]卡尔·威特
孩子在成长的过程中,可能会出现各种各样的坏习惯,有的是任性、自大,有的时刻都不忘记表现自己,有的爱捉弄人,有的甚至以自己的行为危害他人、损坏财物。面对这许多问题,父母应该采取不同的办法去加以解决,以达到最好的效果。
很多父母认为,为了防止孩子养成不良习惯就要对孩子了如指掌。其实这种想法也不完全正确。孩子都有自己的秘密,大孩子有,小孩子也有。许多父母都不去注意这一点,要么认为小孩子没有什么秘密,要么就是千方百计地挖掘孩子的秘密。这种想法和做法都是不正确的。孩子自有孩子的秘密,只是在大人看来算不上秘密而已。孩子是非常幼稚的,他们心目中那种秘而不宣的东西就是秘密。父母不应该时刻窥探,不要对此过多地追问,更不要干涉,特别是对健康合理的、无害的秘密。这样,哪怕是两三岁的孩子也会更加信任父母,与父母更加亲密。有了这种信任和亲密,孩子可能会把他们的秘密告诉父母。如果父母一味追问,孩子得不到父母应有的尊重、信任,孩子会感到他没有地位,就会心灰意冷,逐渐失去积极性,甚至会很小就关闭自己的心灵大门。当然尊重孩子的秘密,并不等于对此不管不问,而是要求父母时时刻刻关注孩子的内心世界,健康地加以引导,不健康的则应在充分尊重和理解孩子的前提下,去关心和引导他。
除了儿子之外,我也接触过不少和他年龄相仿的孩子。我发现几乎任何一种不良行为,孩子都会凭着自己的理解去获得某种自以为是的“奖励”。我认为,父母的责任就是要去发现和取消这种“奖励”。我的一位朋友有两个孩子,他的儿子是一个非常调皮的孩子,处处都让人感觉到他的与众不同,经常干些令人心烦的事,经常欺负妹妹和别的小伙伴。
有一天,我的这位朋友找到我,想让我给他提供一些管教孩子的办法。
他对我说:“我的儿子真令人讨厌,他不仅喜欢嘲弄别人,连吃面包也与其他孩子不同。他明明知道我讨厌他的某些行为,可他偏偏那么做,好像是专门在气我。”
听了他说的话,我感到很奇怪。这孩子连吃面包都会惹父亲生气,恐怕也有些太与众不同了吧。于是,我要求去看看这个孩子。
那天我和朋友一家共进午餐。在饭桌上,我特意仔细观察这个调皮的孩子。
我发现,这个孩子在吃面包的时候,把面包皮细心地剥下来,然后用手把它捏成一个球形吃掉,而把剩下的部分丢在盘子里。与此同时还得意扬扬地对他母亲说:“妈妈,我把面包皮剥下来了!”
于是,他的母亲开始训斥他:“你怎么总是这样,居然还当着客人的面。”这时,他的父亲似乎也要发怒了。
我给朋友使了一个眼色,示意他不要发怒。饭后我给他讲了一个“对付”孩子的办法。
第二次,这个孩子故技重施,像往常那样把面包皮剥下来后,也对母亲说:“妈妈,我把面包皮剥下来了。”可是她的母亲只说了一声:
“我知道。”
孩子说:“你不说我吗?”
“不说。”
没过多久,我的那位朋友又找到了我,说孩子现在已经没有剥面包皮的习惯,也和其他人用一样的方法吃面包了。他觉得很奇怪,问我是什么原因。
其实道理很简单,孩子的那种做法就是为了引起别人的注意,即使被父母责骂,他也会觉得受了重视。在他眼里,父母的责骂就是一种奖励,而他的做法就是为了这种奖赏。后来,父母对他的这一举动不闻不问,毫不关心,他自己也渐渐觉得没趣了,所以在不知不觉中改掉了坏习惯。
还有一个小男孩,染上了说粗话的习惯。因为他的一个小伙伴爱说“屁股”两个字,他学会了带回家里。由于这两个字不是什么风雅的词,他的母亲觉得很讨厌,很快就加以制止。可是相反,孩子不但没有停止说这两个字,还一连几个星期编造出不少关于“屁股”的话,说什么“天上有个屁股”“屁股点心”“甜屁股”等。他的母亲气得不行,最后干脆懒得理他。后来孩子发现这样说已经不能引起父母的注意,也就慢慢地不说了。
这是因为孩子起初说的粗话得到了旁人的奖赏而反复地说,后来没有了鼓励就不说了,曾经使他颇感兴趣的粗话也就渐渐地被遗忘掉。
对于孩子来说,能够得到父母有效的管教是非常有利于他们健康成长的。有些父母对孩子的管教仅仅停留在管住孩子上,让孩子循规蹈矩,没有活力,没有创造性。这种办法根本不能让孩子健康地发展。在我看来,这种管法还不如不管。也有些父母因为顾及孩子的自尊心而不去教育孩子,这也是错误的做法。
卡尔也会做错事。每当面对这种情况时,我不会像其他父母那样总是使用“不准这样”“不要这样”“不行”这些消极的、否定的词语,因为这些语言容易使孩子觉得自己一无是处,会增加他的消极情绪。我总是用积极的、肯定性的语言,给儿子以明确的行为指导,增加他的积极情绪。以我的经验,这样做往往会收到较好的效果。或许儿子在我这里听得最多的话就是“这样做”“努力去做”这些积极的、带有鼓励性的语言吧。
在对卡尔的教育和管束上,我竭力做到既有效制止他的不良行为,又尽量减小或不产生负面影响。我认为这是管理孩子要遵循的最基本的原则。
卡尔小的时候喜欢在墙上乱画,虽然我给他买了学习绘画的用具,但他仍然克制不住自己的这一癖好,总是趁我不注意时偷偷地用笔在墙上涂抹。
有一次,正当他在墙上画得高兴的时候,被我抓了个正着。
“卡尔,你在做什么?”我立刻制止了他。
卡尔迅速地转过身,把笔藏在了身后,并用身体挡住了刚刚涂抹的东西。
我当时并没有给他讲道理,也没有训斥他,只是制止他再那样干下去,并让他独自一人到他自己的房间里待一会儿。
过了一阵,我把他叫出来,并询问他为什么要在墙上画。
他说:“爸爸,我知道错了。因为我刚才在房间中想了很久,我想我的行为破坏了墙壁的清洁。其实我有画画的纸张,我应该在纸上画画而不是在墙上画。您曾经给我讲过不能随便弄脏东西的道理,所以我犯错误是不应该的,请您惩罚我吧。”
我并没有惩罚卡尔,叫他去房间一个人待一会儿的目的就是让他自己想清楚这个道理。因为孩子有时在做某件事时,纯粹是一时兴起,他可能也懂得这些道理,只是一时管不住自己。如果我当场就去训斥他,或把那些讲过多次的道理再给他讲一次,一定不会有这样好的效果。孩子自己从内心里真正认识到了错误,这样的印象就会留得很深,也就会减少他再犯错误。
我这样做,只是为了让他无聊而乏味地单独待一会儿,这不算是一种惩罚的方法。他一个人待着的时候。做什么事都没有关系,只是让他把刚才在墙上画的那股劲冷下来。如果他能在房问里对自己的行为有所反思,那就再好不过了。
我认为,这种方法可以适用于很多情况。比如,当两个孩子发生争执或打架时,一般来说都会互相告状,争论不休。父母只要让他们停下来,把他们分开让他们各自单独待一会儿,可能什么问题都能得到轻松的解决。因为孩子之间不可能有什么深仇大恨,只是在一时气头上发生争执罢了。如果父母不是这样将他们分开而是去给他们讲道理,那么会更加深他们之间的矛盾,带来更多的麻烦。
当孩子情绪不好时,不要过多地招惹他,在他遇到困难时不要用过激的话刺激他,要等他平静下来之后再去慢慢开导。
我在教育儿子的过程中逐渐积累了一些经验:当孩子为某事就要发火时,应该转移他的注意力,使他暂时忘记不高兴的事,慢慢地平静下来。父母一定要冷静,不要火上浇油,更不要用简单粗暴的行为去制止。孩子静下来之后,父母要加倍体贴,好言安抚,等他冷静下来后再说。
当孩子正在气头上时,不要直接与他讲理,因为这时他是什么都听不进去的。这时,父母更不能向孩子发脾气。发脾气就像传染病,用发脾气的方法制止发脾气是不明智的举动,这只能使脾气越发越大。
如果孩子在大庭广众下发脾气,父母一定不能顺从他。很多父母由于害怕孩子当众发脾气而常常顺着孩子,这种做法是极为有害的。因为孩子虽小,也自有狡猾的一面,常常利用父母的弱点发起进攻。父母一定要想办法不要让孩子知道这一点。如果孩子当着他人提出什么要求,父母最好给予帮助,合理的要求就满足他。如果硬要等到他发脾气再去帮助他,后果就不好了。对孩子的要求要有选择地满足,不合理的要求可间接地答复,如告诉他回家再说,或对他表示等客人走了再说,等等。

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欣叶 御大福 芋头麻薯 180g

周销量 600+

$1.66 $1.99 83折
Yami
欣葉
2种选择
欣叶 御大福 芋头麻薯 180g

周销量 600+

$1.66 $1.99 83折
Yami
欣葉
2种选择
欣叶 御大福 芋头麻薯 180g

周销量 600+

$1.66 $1.99 83折
Yami
欣葉
2种选择
欣叶 御大福 芋头麻薯 180g

周销量 600+

$1.66 $1.99 83折
Yami
欣葉
2种选择
欣叶 御大福 芋头麻薯 180g

周销量 600+

$1.66 $1.99 83折

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