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Jingdong book

爱我，就不要控制我

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Books Psychology Popular psychology books

Jingdong book

爱我，就不要控制我

Name: 爱我，就不要控制我
Brand: Jingdong book
SKU: 3116001401
Price: 24.09 USD
Availability: OutOfStock

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Editer Recommend

作者是从关系中成长的专家
她用讲故事的方式讲述了她个人令人启发的丰富经历
并同时提供实用的解决方案
每章中的练习非常有效，这一次，你将明白疼爱自己的真谛，成长为一个独立快乐的人！

Content Description

梅乐蒂·碧媞通过《爱我，就不要控制我》确立“情感依赖症”的完整含义，指出它并不是一种疾病，而是一系列行为，认识这些行为，可以帮助我们认出它们以便采取有效的措施。在条理明晰地讲述各种行为的同时，作者分享她个人的生命经历，通过讲故事的方式以及一系列完整测验，让我们认识自己情感依赖的程度，让我们学会忠于自己，疼惜自己，更有力量健康地照顾自己和他人，成为一个身心独立的完整的人。

Author Description

梅乐蒂·碧媞，是美国最受欢迎的自我成长作家，她的国际畅销书《超然独立的爱》销售超过八百万本，翻译成十余种语言。数百万读者，信任她睿智的语言并愿意被她引导，因为她亲身经历过他们正体验的事。
“碧媞了解被抛弃的感觉，这样有助于她对那些还在漂泊的人丢出一条救生索。”《时代杂志》如是说。梅乐蒂?碧媞是“情感依赖症”的专家，写过十五本书，包括《放下，更自在》、《超越情感依赖症》、《悲伤俱乐部》等，她现居南加州，並在全球各地演讲。
苏子尧，台湾师范大学教育心理与辅导学系学士，台湾师范大学翻译研究所硕士。曾任中学辅导教师，台湾师范大学青少年辅导研究社指导老师，现任台北县立万里中学总务主任。译有《焦点解决教育：一个更快乐的学校》（与王文华合译）。
许妍飞，台湾师范大学翻译研究所硕士，曾任台湾财经新闻台译者，台湾清华大学外语系讲师。目前旅居美国，专事翻译。近期译作有《一点小改变，简单医百病》《在家也能蒙特梭利》等。

Comments

《爱我，就不要控制我》是梅乐蒂·碧媞最新最完整的-部作品，我一口气读完，并反复阅读，发现很多技巧非常有帮助。很多事情她都经历过，这些解决方法因此是经过验证的。这本书对我就像一个作业本，需要不断翻开以帮助我解决人生的功课。
——霍莉·金凯德（Amazon读者，美国印第安州）

这本碧媞的最新版书很平实易懂，而且非常有帮助。我特别享受阅读评估部分，可以帮我更好地理解我的行为。
——莎伦·黑德里克（Amazon读者）

梅乐蒂·碧娓的书注重实践，对渴望成长为一个独立自由的人非常实用。书里既讲述她本人的故事，也有对问题的深思，以及对于思考的满足，这-切如此精彩，永远不会令人失望。
——皮科克女士（Amazzon读者，加拿大）

Catalogue

第一章跨越界线，再踏回线内
1.照顾自己
2.如何使用本书
3.认识共依存症
4.共依存症新貌
5.放下标签污名

第二章摆脱控制陷阱，得到恩典
1.自我照顾：不断演进的艺术
2.界限
3.照顾别人
4.药物依赖与共依存
5.沟通
6.控制
7.否认
8.依赖
9.原生家庭的新遗产
10.施与受
11.自爱会传染
12.操弄
13.来玩吧
14.滋养
15.执着
16.力量的秘密
17.共依存症的发展
18.做自己的自由
19.不抵抗
20.性亲密与共依存症
21.顺服与恩典

第三章有意识的和自己建立关系
情绪健康测验
愤怒测验
恐惧测验
小题大作与不幸成瘾测验
罪恶感测验
悲伤与失落测验

第四章抓了就放：只是种感觉
1.打开潘多拉的盒子
2.处理感觉
3.恐惧
4.要作伴，不要不幸
5.罪恶感
6.通往心的道路

第五章疑难排解指南
1.发生……的时候，该怎么做
2.如何为各种状况找到协助
附录延伸阅读

Book Abstract

1. 照顾自己
我知道完全失去自我的感觉，你感觉不到“你自己”，甚至不知道是否有个自己存在过。我有三十年不知道界限为何物，又花了十年学习建立界限。我不断付出，直到精疲力竭，需要别人照顾为止。我恐吓、祈求、暗示、操弄，好得到我要的东西。我深信自己知道什么对他人最好，忙着教别人学他们的功课，却忘了学习自己的课题。
和一个男人见面几分钟，我便确定自己遇到灵魂伴侣。几个小时后，我就会开始幻想两人的婚礼。电视是这样演，现实人生不也是如此吗？我花了两年时间试着走入关系，再花五年深陷其中，一路爬出来。我困扰难安，头痛不已。
就像其它数百万的男女一样，我小时候曾受虐过。但是我没有追究作恶者的责任，反而怪自己不对，“我一定哪里有问题。”我当时不了解，发生在自己身上的恶运其实也会发生在别人身上。觉得问题是自己造成的，这是悲伤的过程难免要经过的阶段。我们受虐了，会觉得羞愧也是正常的。责怪自己是一种生存技能，让我们在遇到不合理的事时，觉得自己还有办法掌控人生，因为我们完全无法合理解释自己为什么受虐。
而且，女人不是本就该受苦受难吗？我们都会牺牲自我。所以我变成了烈士，把照顾他人视为我的职责。如果我照顾别人，便希望对方知恩图报，反过来照顾我。但事与愿违。一旦开启了这种行为模式，大家便期待我会继续照顾下去。有太多因素让我没有照顾自己：我的字典里没有“不”字，因为好人是无私的。爱自己是不被允许的。太自私了！但是，我没有照顾自己的主要原因，其实是我不知道该怎么做。
我们有不少人曾经不知道（或现在还不知道）如何照顾自己，书上没写，学校没教。我们买一般产品时会拿到使用手册，可是我们拿不到人生的参考指南。我们踉跄走过错综复杂的处境，自己想办法厘清问题。控制与照顾他人，这一整套的情感依赖行为（Codependent Behaviors）成了生存工具、生活技能，让我们自以为靠这些就能安全无虞。接着这些行为开始反噬，弄僵我们与他人的关系，让人生陷入停滞，但是我们却百思不得其解，因为这些求生行为已经习惯成自然。
……

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