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Jingdong book

整理情绪的力量

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Books Motivation & Success Self-Regulation

Jingdong book

整理情绪的力量

Name: 整理情绪的力量
Brand: Jingdong book
SKU: 3112018561
Price: 19.23 USD
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·《整理情绪的力量》出版3年间重印40余次，销量突破20万本，广受女性读者欢迎的情绪调节专家有川真由美告诉你，房间要收纳法，情绪要整理术。

·你的生活方式，与你如何对待情绪垃圾息息相关。《整理情绪的力量》选择了愤怒、焦虑、嫉妒、拖延等多种生活中时刻出现的消极情绪与习惯，以实用、亲切的情绪调节技巧依次审视，各个击破，割断消极情绪的乱麻，彻底将它们逐出生活。按本书中介绍的方法去做，你的心境也会像大扫除后一样轻松透明。

Content Description

人人都有陷入消极情绪中难以自拔的时候，如何应对消极情绪便成了实现目标、提高生活质量的关键。

有川真由美倡导的“情绪整理”方法旨在帮助我们协调情绪与现实之间的关系，她从愤怒开始，列举了如焦躁、孤独、疲惫、怨恨、嫉妒、自卑、逃避、怠惰、后悔和不安等现代人生活中常见的情绪垃圾和消极状态，你可能还没有发觉它们的出现，就已经成为它们的猎物。本书会教你辨识这些堆积在内心的污泥，以简单实用的方法，速度摆脱它们的影响。

情绪如同马车，理性是缰绳。手腕高明的驾车者懂得平复自己的情绪，安抚它、取悦它，心情愉悦地享受自己的人生之旅。

Author Description

有川真由美，出生于日本鹿儿岛县姶良市，作家、摄影师，做过化妆品公司职员、补习班讲师、科学馆讲解员、优衣库店长、和服穿法讲师、婚礼策划、《南日本新闻》编辑等工作，活跃于书籍、杂志等传媒领域，为职业女性提供从礼仪指导到职场入门等方面的诸多建议。如今她在35个国家和地区旅行，撰写随笔与纪实文学，著有《会工作、运气好的人的习惯》《30岁的你是成长还是停滞》等书籍。

Catalogue

前言

第 1 章不生气的理由

生气的时间成本

生气的体能成本

生气时会失去判断力

生气阻碍沟通

易怒的人给他人的坏印象

生气时无法认清事实

受害者心态不可有

再生气也无法改变他人

愤怒之下隐藏着其他情绪

不受愤怒困扰的人

转换愤怒的能量

痛快地倾吐情绪

缺乏信赖关系，生气毫无用处

责备女性前要知道的事

责备男性前要知道的事

愤怒的男女之别

整理愤怒

第 2 章整理情绪的 12 个关键

握住情绪马车的缰绳

以情绪更新法改善现状

积极行动转移注意力

积极言语消除烦躁情绪

转变思考方式以更新情绪

专心考虑该怎样做

问题与情绪分开思考

少一些好恶标准

太无私的人无法整理情绪

独处以整理情绪

不执着于自己没有之物

相信人可以改变

第 3 章不烦躁的理由

烦躁的人给自己制造障碍

烦躁的人给他人的坏印象

烦躁的人难获幸福

一味被动会让人烦躁

老好人的误区

贪心无益

用幽默和笑容击退烦躁

找到烦躁的原因

不拘泥于小事

过度苛求也会导致烦躁

不为不必要的信息困扰

认真做准备

练出不易烦躁的状态

不受他人的烦躁情绪影响

整理烦躁

第 4 章不被孤独和悲伤击垮的理由

孤独从何而来

感到孤独后的反应

感到孤独的原因

享受独来独往的乐趣

两个人的孤独更可怕

自我牺牲的爱和占有欲强烈的爱

人本孤独

孤独的创造力

整理孤独

每一个人都会悲伤

悲伤背后更多的是喜悦

悲喜交织，苦乐相伴

让辛苦变甜的方法

与压力为友

悲伤之中的感恩之心

有他人的帮助，才能跨越悲伤

给内心排毒

避免徒增不必要的悲伤

整理悲伤

第 5 章不被阴暗情绪侵蚀的理由

怨恨是最可怕的情绪

不被报复牵着鼻子走

整理怨恨之前要做的事

整理怨恨

拒绝攀比

嫉妒会因连带感而变大

受人嫉妒时的应对之道

吃醋源于自私

两性的嫉妒温差

整理嫉妒（普通篇）

整理嫉妒（恋爱篇）

应对自我厌恶

不要期待过高

不拿自卑当借口

从不断失败中学习

信心有多强，可能性就有多大

体现价值的环境由自己创造

整理自我厌恶

第 6 章不失去内心张力的理由

应对无力感

工作上的干劲只能靠自己激发

守旧会为消极情绪加码

怎样走出瓶颈期

越忙碌越爱拖延

多一些喜欢，就多一些干劲

整理拖延症

为了未来，不要否定过去

不重复同样的错误

应对负罪情绪

应对纠结情绪

以感恩与学习代替悔意

整理后悔

不安背后的恐惧

让梦想变为现实的法则

利用不安情绪

切忌焦虑

太敏感会导致不安

让一切顺其自然

整理不安

后记

出版后记

Book Abstract

生气的体能成本

愤怒是破坏性能量，喜悦是创造性能量

生气会让人吃亏的第二个原因是，这种情绪会白白浪费你的能量。

如果无法整理好负面情绪，能量就会被消耗在消极方面。人一生气就会消耗能量，每一个人或许都对此有所体会：如果勃然大怒，与对方争吵起来，最后就会搞得自己疲惫不已；如果咬咬牙努力忍住，也会被一股说不出的疲惫感侵袭。

若是一直无法整理好愤怒的情绪，能量就会一直消耗下去。

“愤怒”这种负面情绪，是破坏性能量。如果所有事都能如自己希望的那样发展，那么也就不会有生气这回事了，但生活中有太多无可奈何的事情，因此也就有了愤怒。

愤怒爆发后，如果这些爆发出的能量发泄到别人身上，就会伤害对方。这世上的绝大部分大事件都是愤怒导致的，愤怒甚至会引发战争。如此看来，愤怒实在是可怕。

而比这些更糟糕的是，愤怒的能量甚至会侵蚀自身。怀着自己无法整理的愤怒，有时会伤及身心。愤怒的人总会一直感到烦躁不安，情绪低落，也无法打起精神来认真做事。不仅如此，更严重的时候还会因此失眠、抑郁，甚至出现高血压、胃溃疡等疾病。极大的愤怒会给五脏六腑带去伤害，有时甚至会榨干生命力。愤怒非常可怕。

相反，“喜悦”这种正面情绪则是创造性能量。肯定现实，感受到爱，就可以创造出很多东西。家庭、工作、恋爱、人际关系、娱乐、学习、生活……在各种领域中，人们正是因为有喜悦才能继续前进。即便有再多的障碍和辛劳、烦恼，只要喜悦存在于我们的生活中，我们就可以克服它们，开辟出新的道路。

“创造”与“破坏”形影不离，愤怒会把喜悦创造出来的东西接连不断地破坏掉。愤怒会让你在辛苦的创造和培育的过程中付出的努力全部付诸东流。

若用金钱来比喻的话，喜悦就是存款，愤怒就是借款了吧。你希望自己的人生多些存款还是借款呢？

是否要用喜悦来铸造我们宝贵的人生，还需要犹豫吗？

生气时会失去判断力

愤怒背后是人们的防御本能

一生气就会吃亏的第三个原因是判断力会消失。

听任愤怒情绪的摆布是非常危险的。人在勃然大怒时会无法控制自己的言论，因此可能一不留神便会说出不该说的话，或是变得自暴自弃，从而失去自己重要的东西。

假设在工作中被人无心地批评了一句“都是你给大家添了这么多麻烦”，你十分生气，想要反驳对方“等等，怎么就怪我了”，就好像煮开的锅瞬间沸腾一样，你可能会反击对方，

说“你之前不也给大家添了不少麻烦”，或是放出“既然如此，那我不干了”这种狠话。

愤怒的一个特征就是，一旦因情绪激动而把它表现出来，它便会让自己更加怒不可遏。但是冷静下来后，人们就会忍不住后悔，“也不是什么值得激动的事情”“早知如此当初就不那么说了”。

那么我们为什么会变得如此激动呢？

愤怒的真面目，其实是人们想要保护自己的“防御本能”。

当我们感觉到自己即将蒙受损失时，就会一下子进入战斗模式，想要去攻击和自己敌对的人。我们变得情绪化的时候，会因为想要一心一意保护自己而看不到别的事情。因此，不要把发言权交给感情，不让感情对自己的行动发号施令，才是最明智的选择，特别是要避免在此时做出重要的决定，或是说出可能会伤害对方的言论。这时的举动不仅在感情上缺乏说服力，还有可能会搬起石头砸自己的脚。

此外，即便是为了保护自己而愤怒，攻击他人也会使自己树敌更多。此时，尽力忍耐才是上策。心烦意乱的时候，不要去做任何事，让这样的状态自行过去。等心情平静下来，再来思考怎样做才更好，一定可以找到更好的方法。

你可以阐述自己立场的正当性，但是把自己的压力控制在最小的程度、让工作顺利进行下去才是当务之急。即便要反驳别人，也要等自己冷静下来之后，让自己化身演员，面带微笑地询问对方 :“可以请您告诉我怎样做更好吗？”之后再采取行动吧。

而接下来的发展，可能会出现你意想不到的转机。

……

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Jingdong book

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