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Jingdong book

孩子内心是否强大完全取决于妈妈

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孩子的未来由内心是否强大决定,孩子内心是否强大完全取决于妈妈!
内心强大的孩子遇挫不折,让孩子拥有强大的内心比培养天才儿童更重要!
学校不会给孩子“独立生存”的教育,社会不会给孩子“宽松适应”的环境,妈妈培养孩子“内心强大”是唯一出路!

Content Description

孩子的未来是由“内心是否强大”决定的,孩子内心是否强大是由妈妈决定的!为什么你是否知道,做一个好妈妈是有有效期的。孩子小时候会把妈妈当作全知全能的倚赖,而这也正是妈妈教育孩子的黄金期;进入青春期后,妈妈就很难继续对孩子施加影响,此时应该是验收教子成绩的时候了:你的孩子是否能够面对一时的挫折和失败、是否能处理好不同情境下的人际关系、是否有独立于社会的能力……学校不会给孩子“独立生存”的教育,社会不会给孩子“宽松适应”的环境,妈妈们培养孩子“内心强大”就是在塑造孩子美好的未来!好妈妈胜过好老师,教会孩子内心强大,你就给了孩子最棒的教育!
Author Description

和田秀树,1960年出生于大阪市。国际医疗福祉大学研究生院教授(临床心理学专业)、一桥大学经济学部客座讲师(医疗经济学)、川崎幸医院精神科顾问。近些年来,他关注于实用心理学,出版了多部具有影响力的著作,代表作有《孩子内心是否强大完全取决于妈妈》《培养孩子喜欢学习的方法》《人因“感情”而老化》《大人们的学习法》《打动人心的心理学》等。
Catalogue

第1章 让孩子内心强大的妈妈们正在做的事
以坦诚的亲子对话练就孩子强大内心/003
锤炼孩子不被困难击倒的强韧精神/008
养成坚信“我家的孩子没问题”的习惯/012
教育孩子“在外什么能说什么不能说”/017
多参与竞争,无论胜负孩子都能成长/021
让孩子在补习班学习与学校不同的价值观/025
增强孩子的抗压能力也是父母的职责/028
让孩子主动学习的方法/033
第2章 好妈妈给孩子源源不绝的上进心
永不服输是培养孩子上进心的方法/041
我能顺利考上名校滩中的原因/044
相信孩子能行,孩子就一定认为“我能行”/048
引导孩子认真思考“将来想成为什么样的人”/052
孩子进入青春期前的父母须知/058
孩子是否有好朋友取决于父母/063
现在的孩子与过去的孩子的最大区别/066
告诉孩子,没必要让每个人都喜欢你/069
不要总害怕孩子的心灵会受到伤害/074
第3章 在家培养孩子“不输给自己的精神”
铁的法则——孩子学习期间关闭电视/083
内心强大的孩子考试能力强/087
发现孩子的优势并把优势强化为才能/090
让孩子在餐桌上回忆在学校学了什么/095
“不让一人落后”的教育方法/099
聪明孩子的学习时间是“学年×20分”/101
让孩子不再逃避学习/106
“内心强大的孩子”身体也强壮/112
第4章 孩子的意志力强弱由教育决定
把学校作为学习人际关系的场所/119
对学校老师可以期待的事与不可期待的事/125
让孩子每天早晨打招呼可以改变一切/128
最好让孩子觉得“父亲很强大”/134
七条家庭规则培养意志坚强的孩子/140
说到就要做到是培养孩子责任感的好办法/144
制定规则,让孩子不断进步/150
聪明妈妈告诉孩子什么不能做/153
第5章 让孩子拥有“只要做就能行”的强大自信
好妈妈培养小学生价值观的最佳方法/161
把伟人传放在孩子的书架上/163
激发孩子的良性嫉妒/167
和孩子一起制定手机使用规则/171
“让孩子远离有害网页”的基本知识/175
把电脑放在一眼看得到的客厅里/178
“父母的爱”是孩子成长的动力/182

Book Abstract

让孩子不再逃避学习
学习绝不是件轻松的事。
我们甚至可以说,学习的过程是痛苦多于快乐的,相信即使对那些学习成绩优异的人来说也是如此。
那么,学习成绩优秀的孩子与不优秀的孩子到底有何区别呢?
我认为,二者之间的区别就在于不逃避学习的内心强弱之差。
如前文所述,孩子只有具备学习能力才能依靠自己的力量过上幸福的生活。因此,他们必须从小开始好好学习。
无论多么讨厌学习,你学的东西早晚都要派上用场。既然这样,如果因为讨厌学习而逃避学习,那就百害而无一利。
既然无论如何都必须学习,那么,与其选择逃避,还不如花些时间和精力研究“不痛苦学习”的方法。
会这么思考的一般都是不逃避痛苦的内心强大的孩子。
那么,面对逃避学习的孩子,父母又该如何做呢?
我认为首先应让孩子拥有成功的体验。
无论是学习还是体育活动,只要让孩子体验到战胜他人的喜悦,他(她)就会想在其他方面也超越别人。而这种欲望正是帮助其战胜困难与挫折的动力,也能极大地影响到孩子的学习进取心。
因此,首先应重点发展孩子喜爱的科目和优势科目,让其体验到“只要做就能成功”的乐趣。
如果无论孩子怎么刻苦学习都不能使成绩有所提高、不能超越他人,他们往往就会丧失干劲和自信。
特别是小学生,让其拥有“我能行”的自信尤为重要。
孩子之所以逃避学习是因为对学习没有自信。如果经过千辛万苦的努力后还是以失败告终,再想帮助孩子提高自信就更是难上加难了。
因此,在采取其他行动前,最重要的是培养孩子的自信心,让孩子相信自己能行。
而让孩子相信自己的最好方法就是成功的体验,即让孩子在自己喜爱的科目和优势科目上取得好成绩。
因为这些科目是自己喜欢的、擅长的,所以孩子就可以在快乐地学习的同时考出好成绩。
如果在考试中取得了好成绩,那么孩子不但会对优势科目产生坚不可摧的自信,还会把这种自信转化为学习其他科目的动力。
虽说全科平衡发展很重要,但我认为,集中力量发展优势科目,并让孩子拥有该科目成绩遥遥领先的体验会更有效率。
以我为例。虽然我上小学时比较擅长学习,但并不是所有科目都很突出。相对而言,数学是比较优秀的,而语文,特别是阅读理解则是我的弱项。
语文的阅读理解不像数学有固定的套用公式,从某种意义上说,它更需要领悟能力。
为此,无论是备战中考还是高考,我都得在语文上费尽心思。
而我之所以能将语文成绩保持在中等水平,无非是因为我拥有数学优势带来的自信。
虽然对我来说,学习语文不像数学那样顺利,但只要我多做些阅读题就能掌握答题的技巧。
得益于这种小小的成功,我的语文成绩有了大幅度提高。
如果孩子在某个科目上取得了优秀成绩,他们就会将这种成功体验化为继续努力的动力。
反之,如果最终收获的是失败,他们就会意志消沉,认为自己无论怎么努力都不会成功。
因此,让孩子通过重点发展优势科目获得自信,就成为了实现其他一切目标的前提。
至于何时攻克劣势科目,在孩子获得自信后再去做也不迟。
“内心强大的孩子”身体也强壮
我们的社会,不仅存在着孩子学习能力低下的问题,体能低下的问题也同样严重。
从前,就算孩子不爱学习也会在室外精力充沛地玩耍,而如今的孩子只要稍稍运动就会上气不接下气。
因为现在是一个电视、游戏机、手机等电子产品无处不在的世界,所以外出玩耍的孩子数量锐减。
对此,各界人士都纷纷表示,这会造成孩子体能低下。
甚至还有人指出,随着车辆的普及,城市孩子的体能已经远远比不上乡村的孩子了。
虽说现在大力提倡“让孩子茁壮成长”,但想要实现却并非易事。回想我小时候,不是在广阔的原野上奔跑,就是在空地上与伙伴一起打棒球,身体自然而然就得到了锻炼。
但是,现在的情况却大不如从前。
住在城市里的孩子,既没有原野可供他们疯跑,也没有草地可让他们打棒球。非但如此,现在很多孩子喜欢玩游戏已经胜过了外出玩耍。
甚至可以这么说,通过玩耍锻炼身体的好环境已自行消失了。
以前经常有人把只顾学习的孩子称为“豆芽菜”,但现在努力学习的孩子反而体力更好。
据某中学备考补习班的调查显示,努力备考的孩子比消极应考的孩子睡眠时间更长。
众所周知,想要提高学习成绩,早起早睡才最有效率。而补课班老师也会把这一诀窍告诉努力备考的孩子们。
那些沉迷于电视、游戏、手机短信的孩子因为就寝时间晚,很容易引发睡眠质量问题,导致体能下降。
据说,有很多小学三年级的孩子经常一两点以后就寝,这让人很是惊讶。
长此以往,孩子的发育必将受到妨碍。
通过我对孩子们的体能现状所作的分析,大家已经大致了解了体能好的孩子和体能差的孩子有何差别了吧?
如今,无论是参加补习班还是体育教室,相比那些没有目标意识的孩子,拥有目标意识的孩子的体能都要更好。
这并非言过其实。
可以毫不夸张地说,和那些选择电视和游戏的孩子相比,选择补习班和体育教室的孩子因为早已在竞争中经历了千锤百炼,所以内心更强大。
正是孩子们内心的强弱之别导致了体能之差。
如今的时代,父母必须替孩子们做些选择。
无论是选择让孩子去文化补习班,还是体育教室、音乐教室,总之,只要让孩子有事可做就行,至于具体参加什么补习班并不重要。
综上所述,让孩子“选择做些什么”也是父母的工作。
……
Introduction

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About the brand

Jingdong book