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Jingdong book

荒谬旅游文学：无何有诸国游记

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Books Novels Hong Kong / Macao / Taiwan novels
Jingdong book

荒谬旅游文学：无何有诸国游记

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潘通墨双色印刷，书口刷黑，封面、环衬为日本进口特种纸，插页手贴藏书票，带编码，限量发行。内文编排，见出版实物。
Content Description

“无何有”——语出《庄子·逍遥游》，即什么都没有。原句是“无何有之乡”，意指寻不到的乌托邦。但它在柏杨的脑海里，时时挥不去。
《荒谬旅游文学：无何有诸国游记》是一部章回体小说，小说写的是《西游记》里唐僧师徒取经回来后，周游列国的故事。在故事里，唐僧师徒四人，经历了一番世事变迁，将各个“国家”的乱象一一披露出来，例如“猛生国”的强制生育政策，“红包国”的官僚习气，“诗人国”的文学糜烂之风。——当然，如果你看出了其他的什么，请勿对号入座。
Author Description

柏杨，自称“野生动物”，仿佛生于一九二〇年阴历九月初七，被归类为河南省辉县人。一九四九年到台湾，口诛笔伐的人文斗士，以杂文见诸报端。一九六八年三月七日，因“大力水手”事件，被当局以“共产党间谍”以及“打击国家领导中心”的罪名逮捕入狱，要求判处死刑，后改判有期徒刑十二年，终减为八年。
狱中著有：
《中国人史纲》
而后十年，恢弘巨著：
《柏杨白话版资治通鉴》
《柏杨解密历史档案：通鉴纪事本末》
他说——谁不怕死？……但死亡是绝对的价值。
一生传奇经历，一世著作颇丰，尤以杂文为武器，其中《丑陋的中国人》最为著名。
Catalogue

第一回 回国记
第二回 致训记
第三回 复活记
第四回 报名记
第五回 出浴记
第六回 铁帽记
第七回 下山记
第八回 出发记
第九回 红包国
第十回 猛生国
第十一回 开会国
第十二回 诗人国
第十三回 歪脖国
第十四回 西崽国
第十五回 恶医国
第十六回 飞帽国
第十七回 官崽国
Book Abstract

“禀太师，赵高老爷到。”
“莫非是指鹿为马，京戏里《宇宙锋》那个挨骂的老头儿乎？”
“正是此人。”
秦桧听说，大喜过望，急叫曰：“还不快请，更待何时。”
看官，你道赵高先生怎的到了长安？说来话长，自从他指鹿为马，害死了老朋友李斯之后，大权独揽，好不得意，一度也曾想把女儿嫁给二世皇帝当小老婆，以便内外夹攻，享一辈子荣华富贵，想不到他女儿是一个恋爱至上主义的小姐，根本没把二世那蠢小子看到眼里，就装起疯来，把老爹骂了个天昏地暗，弄了一肚子霉气。从那天起，交上坏运，不出一年，秦国亡了国，二世被汉兵捉住，就在王宝钏住的寒窑之前，执行枪决，以示薄惩。赵高幸好早有准备，一看苗头不对，就带着妻子儿女、百万家当、夷人银行存款支票，以及洋狗、狼狗、哈巴狗，等等之狗，坐上一架核子喷射船，飞到了车迟之国，做起寓公。最近听说大唐帝国风调雨顺，国泰民安，触起故乡之思，兴起回国一露身手之念。这一日到了长安，印了一盒名片，便往拜访秦桧。二人见面，先行热烈握手，接着说了一遍久仰大名、如雷贯耳的话，然后分宾主坐下。秦桧曰：
“不知兄台驾到，未曾远迎，当面请罪。”
“冒昧拜访，应该早日约期，尚请海涵。”
“兄台不远千里而来，将有利于俺秦桧乎？”
“老哥在上，恕我直言，听说你为唐僧之事，颇伤脑筋，如果交由小弟略施小计，包管他啥官都没有得做。”
秦桧听罢，把头像拨浪鼓一样摇个不停。
“老哥，”赵高日，“看情形你可是有点瞧我不起。”
“实不相瞒，想那唐僧，上得君心，下得民意，眼看就是一字并肩王，掌上大权，届时天下太平，小民过起好日子，讲是非，论公道，既民主，又法治。兄台、兄台，我们还混个啥？”赵高微微一笑，用牙缝声音答曰：“老哥差矣，若说上得君心，下得民意，试问他的手段比李斯如何？李斯那家伙帮秦始皇那私生的小子，打下江山，把他当作左右之臂，二世也把他尊敬得不得了。你想，有李斯在一天，秦国一天不亡，如此重要角色，我都教他栽了筋斗。区区一个唐僧，何足道哉？敬请放心，只要我眉头一耸，就教他吃不了兜着走。”
“不知计将安出？”
“真言不入六耳，”赵高日，“伸脖子过来。”
好赵高，一番言语，只把秦桧说得点头不止。计议完毕，二人就到华清池，先叫了两瓶喂死你，然后各又叫了一个酒女，鸳鸯浴起来。秦桧叫的那个酒女名日白白，赵高叫的那个酒女名日红红，各人找了各人的池子，下了水去。赵高露出一身排骨，比起红红身上丰满雪白玉肌，真是不可相提并论，不禁叹口气曰：“俺赵高和祖国一别六百载，想不到连姑娘身上的皮肉都如此进步。”
“客官请听，”红红笑日，“祖国各项建设，样样突飞猛进，小女子皮肉，何敢后人。不过说来话长，本来奴家是跟锅底一样黑的，有一次遇到一个车迟国的嫖客，他答应带奴家出国享福，好不欢喜，就和他在金谷园租了一幢花园洋房，每月给我十条洋烟，十打洋酒，至少可卖五两银子，过得何等快活。奴家是真心爱他，为他不讲大唐之话，为他不写大唐之文，为他六亲不认，一心高飞。想不到那个没良心的夷人，到时候一声不响，拍拍屁股，走他娘啦，不要说不肯带奴家，让我丢脸，见不得人，就是奴家要他多给几两银子，他都不肯。于是我一气之下，骂了他两句‘干你娘’八格野鹿’，当晚就买了一斤巴拉松，一口气吃掉——”
“啊呀，你一吃一斤？”
“别打岔呀，奴家也不是傻子，怎肯一吃一斤，奴家吃的分量，恰够使我昏昏迷迷，却要不了命。”
“此是为啥？”
“为的是要记者一访，报纸一登，把事情闹大，让世人同情奴家，舆论自会迫他低头，我就出了国啦！”
“此计颇为高明，结果如何？”
红红叹曰：“不提起结果，到还罢了，提起结果，好不伤心，奴家吃了那么多，竟没昏倒过去。但我的皮肉却一天比一天白嫩，真是有意栽花花不发，无心插柳柳成荫。客官哪客官，不瞒你说，奴家要有现在这种本钱，车迟国那人不像人、鬼不像鬼的腥货，我还不爱也。”
“哎呀，”赵高一拍大腿曰，“你那车迟国的洋朋友，姓甚名谁？”
“他叫虎力大仙。”
赵高笑曰：“那家伙弟兄三个，在车迟国着实威风了几年，后来遇到刁钻古怪的孙悟空，打赌砍头，结果一命呜呼，怎的又跑到长安嫖起妓女来啦，难道他不曾死乎？”
……

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Brand Jingdong book
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