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西方心理学大师经典译丛:我们时代的神经症人格

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《西方心理学大师经典译丛:我们时代的神经症人格》系统阐述了霍妮文化神经症理论的基本主张,详细论证了文化因素与神经症形成之间的关系,提出以文化决定论取代弗洛伊德的生物决定论。霍妮认为:“深入探讨有效地导致神经症的各种动力,就会发现,存在着一种一切神经症所共有的基本因素,这就是焦虑……无论神经症的结构多么复杂,这种焦虑始终都是引发神经症过程,并维持其运转的动力。”本书是霍妮对正统精神分析的彻底批判和修正,标志着其思想的形成,也标志着精神分析社会文化学派开始形成。
《西方心理学大师经典译丛:我们时代的神经症人格》以语言平实、清晰明了著称,在简单易懂中蕴涵深刻意义,在出版之初就受到学界的好评和重视,之后多次再版、重印,成为心理学界的畅销书。
本书的重点在于强调神经症患者实际存在的冲突和他为解决这些冲突所付出的努力,以及神经患者实际存在的焦虑和他为对抗这些焦虑所建立起来的防御系统。这种对真实处境的强调,并不意味着我放弃关于神经症的形成是来自童年的早期经验这一观念。
Author Description

卡伦·霍妮(1885-1952),德裔美国心理学家,精神分析社会文化学派的主要代表人物。她既是享有盛誉的精神分析理论家,也是优秀的精神分析师导师和天才的临床实践家。她的著作主要有《我们时代的神经症人格》、《精神分析新法》、《我们的内心冲突》、《自我分析》以及《神经症与人的成长:追求自我实现》等。
霍妮不仅对心理学产生了广泛的影响,也深刻影响了文学、文化、传记、性别、哲学、宗教等研究领域。
Catalogue

导言
第一章 神经症的文化内涵与心理内涵
第二章 为何谈及“我们时代的神经症人格”
第三章 焦虑
第四章 焦虑与敌意
第五章 神经症的基本结构
第六章 对爱的神经性需要
第七章 更多对爱的神经性需要的特征
第八章 获得爱的方式与对拒绝的敏感性
第九章 性欲在对爱的神经性需要中的作用
第十章 对权力、声望以及财富的追求
第十一章 神经性竞争
第十二章 逃避竞争
第十三章 神经性罪恶感
第十四章 神经性受苦的意义(受虐问题)
第十五章 文化与神经症
索引
Book Abstract

第六章 对爱的神经性需要

毫无疑问,在我们的文化中,有四种保护自己免受焦虑的方式,它们在许多人的生活中都可能发挥着决定性的作用。有那样一些人,他们最主要的努力就是得到爱或得到承认,而且为了满足这一愿望,他们会全力以赴;有些人的行为有这样一个特点,即倾向于顺从,屈服,不采取任何自我肯定;有些人的全部努力就是希望获得成功、权力或者占有财物;还有一些人则倾向于将自己封闭起来,不依赖于他人。不过,人们可能会提出这样一个问题,即我宣称这些努力体现了一种对抗某种基本焦虑的保护作用,这一宣称是否正确。难道它们不是既定人类可能性之正常范围内的各种内驱力的一种表现吗?以这种方式来进行争辩,错就错在它采取了一种非此即彼的形式来提出问题。在现实中,这两种观点既不相互矛盾,也不相互排斥。爱的愿望、顺从的倾向、为产生影响或取得成功而付出的努力,以及退缩的倾向,都以各种不同的组合方式存在于我们所有人身上,而没有任何神经症的征象。
而且,这些倾向中的这种或另一种,在某些特定的文化中,可能是一种占据支配地位的态度。这一事实再一次表明,这些倾向很可能是人类身上的正常潜能。正如玛格丽特·米德(Margaret Mead)所描述的,在阿拉佩希文化(Arapesh culture)中,对于爱、母爱的态度,以及对于他人愿望的顺从,乃是占据支配地位的;正如露丝·本尼迪克特(Ruth Benedict)所指出的那样,在夸基乌特尔人(Kwakiutl)中,以相当残忍的方式来追求声望的做法,是一种得到公认的模式;至于出世(to withdraw from the world)的倾向,在佛教中,乃是一个主要的趋势。
我的概念并非旨在否认这些内驱力的正常特性,而是为了坚持这一点,即所有这些内驱力都可以用来对抗焦虑,提供安心;而且,通过获得这种保护性机能,它们的特性就会发生改变,变成某种完全不同的东西。我可以借用一个类比来很好地解释这种差异。我们可能会因为想要测试一下自己的体力和技能,以及想要从高处鸟瞰风景,而爬上一棵树;我们也可能因为被一只野兽追赶而爬上这棵树。在这两种情况下,我们都是爬树,但爬树的动机却完全不同。在第一种情况下,我们爬树是为了娱乐;而在第二种情况下,我们则是受到恐惧的驱使,出于安全的需要而不得不这样做。在第一种情况下,我们要不要爬树完全是自己的自由;而在第二种情况下,我们却因为一种紧迫的需要而被迫这样做。在第一种情况下,我们可以寻找一棵最符合我们意图的树;而在第二种情况下,我们别无选择,必须爬上离自己最近的那棵树,而且它甚至可以不必是一棵树——它也可以是一根旗杆或一栋房屋,只要它能够服务于我们保护自己这个目的即可。
驱动力的不同也会导致感觉与行为方面的一种差异。如果我们受到一种想要获得任一满足的直接愿望的驱使,那么我们的态度将会具有一种自发性、区别性。而如果我们受到焦虑的驱使,那么我们的感觉和行为则会是强迫性的、不加区别的。当然,其间存在着许多过渡阶段。在诸如饥饿和性这样的本能驱力中(这些本能驱力在很大程度上是由源自匮乏的生理紧张所决定),生理紧张可能会堆积到这样一种程度,以至于获得满足的方式在一定程度上带有强迫性和不加区别性,而这两种特性是由焦虑所决定的内驱力的特征。
而且,在所获得的满足中也存在着一种差异——用一般的话来说,这种差异就是快乐和安全感之间的差异。
哈里·斯塔克·沙利文在《关于社会科学研究中精神病学内涵的札记:人际关系研究》[“A Note on the Implications of Psychiatry,the Study of Interpersonal Relations,for Investigation in the Social Sciences”in American Journal of Sociology,vol43(1937)]一文中已经指出,对满足和安全的追求体现了一条调节生活的基本原理。不过,这种差异并不像乍看起来那么鲜明。对于诸如饥饿或性这些本能驱力的满足是快乐,但是,如果生理紧张一直受到抑制,所获得的满足就会非常类似于焦虑缓解所获得的满足。在这两种情况下,都存在着一种从难以忍受的紧张中摆脱出来的宽慰。在强度上,快乐和安全感可能会同样强烈。性的满足,尽管种类不同,却可能与一个人突然从一种强烈的焦虑中解脱出来所产生的感受同样强烈;而且,一般说来,对于安全感的追求不仅可能与本能驱力一样强烈,而且可能会产生同样强烈的满足。
正如我们在前一章讨论过的那样,对安全感的追求,同样也包含着其他次要的满足来源。例如,除了安全感的获得之外,被爱的感觉、被欣赏的感觉,以及获得成功或产生影响的感觉,也可能是具有高度满足感的。此外,正如我们马上就要看到的,获得安全感的各种不同途径,可以使受到压抑的敌意得到发泄,从而提供了另一种摆脱紧张的宽慰感。
我们已经看到,焦虑可能是某些内驱力背后的驱动力,而且我们已经概观了以这种方式产生的一些最为重要的内驱力。现在,我将更为详细地进一步讨论其中的两种内驱力,事实上,这两种内驱力在神经症中发挥了最大的作用:对爱的渴望,对权力和控制的渴望。
对爱的渴望在神经症患者身上非常常见,非常容易被受过训练的观察者辨认出来,以至于可以将它视为标志一种现存的焦虑及其大致强度的最为可靠的指征之一。事实上,如果有人对一个总是具有威胁、怀有敌意的世界从根本上感到无助的话,那么,对爱的寻求就似乎是最合乎逻辑的、最直接的寻找任何种类的仁爱、帮助或欣赏的方式。
如果神经症患者的心理状况就是他心中经常所想的那样,那么,对他来说,要获得爱应该是一件非常容易的事情。如果要我用言语表达出他经常只是模糊地感觉到的东西,那么,他的印象就有点像这样的情况:他所想要的是如此的微乎其微,只不过是希望人们对他友善,给他建议,赏识他这样一个可怜的、无害的、孤寂的灵魂;只不过是急切地想要给他人以快乐,急切地希望不会伤害任何人的情感。这就是他所见或所感的一切。他并没有认识到他的敏感、他潜在的敌意以及他苛刻的要求,对他自己与他人的关系产生了多么严重的干扰;他也无法正确地判断自己给他人留下的是什么样的印象,或者他人对自己作出的是什么样的反应。因此,他自己也很困惑,不理解为什么他的友谊、婚姻、爱情、工作关系总是不能令人感到满意。他倾向于得出这样的结论,即这一切都是他人的错,认为他们不体谅他、不忠贞、恶习缠身;或者由于某个深不可测的原因,他缺乏那种受人欢迎的天赋。因此,他总是不断地去追逐爱的幻象。
如果读者还记得我们前面关于一种受到压抑的敌意如何导致焦虑,以及焦虑反过来如何又导致敌意(换句话说就是,焦虑与敌意是如何不可分割地交织在一起)的讨论,那么,他就能够认识到神经症患者思维中的自我欺骗,以及他之所以会遭遇失败的原因。由于认识不到这一点,所以神经症患者陷入了这样一个困境之中,即他无力去爱,但对他人的爱却又有极大的渴求。在这里,我们必须停下来讨论一个看起来非常简单但实际上却很难回答的问题:什么是爱?在我们的文化中,爱究竟意味着什么?我们有时候会听到这样一个随手给爱下的定义,即爱是一种给予和获得情感的能力。尽管这一定义中也包含着某些真理,但它却过于笼统,不能帮助我们澄清所遇到的困难。我们大多数人都可能在某些时候富有爱心,但是,一种完善的爱的能力却是一种特质。因此,最为重要的考虑应该是流露出的态度:它是对他人表现出来的一种基本的肯定态度,还是出于,例如害怕失去他人或者希望将他人控制在自己手中,而产生的一种态度?换句话说,我们不能把任何一种表现出来的态度都作为标准。

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